Arc-6 Ch-41

There are types of labor pains: pre-labor contractions, true labor contractions, and afterpains. Pre-labor contractions are the tightening or pain felt in the lower abdomen during the final month of pregnancy. The pain is not that strong, the intervals are irregular, and they often subside within a few hours. They are thought to be uterine activity preparing for childbirth. Afterpains refer to the abdominal pain or discomfort felt after giving birth. These are caused by the uterus contracting after the fetus has left it, and they last for several days, easily contributing to mental anxiety combined with the exhaustion of childbirth. What is generally known as labor pain refers to true labor contractions, which occur when childbirth is imminent.

The intervals are regular, but the pain gradually intensifies and the frequency increases. The most troublesome part of childbirth is the true labor contractions. They are probably among the most intense pains a human can experience. The pain becomes like menstrual cramps multiplied many times, occurring more frequently, and each time growing stronger. If it is still bearable, it is a mild stage. When labor truly approaches, thoughts become dominated by the pain.

It hurts, it simply hurts unbearably. Even though it is the duty of noblewomen to leave behind heirs, this pain is intolerable, and my thoughts focus solely on how to lessen the intense agony. Lying on my back on the bed, or instead standing and placing my hands on the wall. Having someone rub around my waist, or refusing to be touched at all. With every wave of pain, I repeat trial and error to somehow ride it out.

Even so, the unavoidable pain shaves away my rationality, leaving only swelling irritation. In the room are Father and my older brother, the obstetrician and his assistant, and several maids of the ducal estate, all watching me with worried expressions. Ever since I began staying at the ducal estate, Father had invited a well-reputed obstetrician from the royal capital in case of emergency and prepared for the childbirth.

"Angie, are you alright?"

"...I am, somehow."

"Please rest assured, my lady's delivery shows no abnormality at present. At this rate, the burden should be light for both mother and child."

The wave of pain had subsided, so I managed to answer Father. Father's concern is appreciated, truly appreciated, but bothersome. And the words of the elderly obstetrician also irritated me.
Childbirth is something in which the mother giving birth and the fetus being born are the ones directly involved, and there is almost no room for others to intervene. I am the only one tormented by the pain, and no one else can take my place. And yet why is this male obstetrician speaking knowingly about my childbirth?

You have never once given birth with your own body. For him to easily describe my pain and suffering simply because he is an obstetrician is utterly unpleasant. Especially since men have different physical structures from women, it is even more irritating that men never have to endure this pain. If only all the men in the world were to turn into women, society might become one where we respect each other more. Right now I want to become an insect or a fish. If they can lay so many eggs at once, then perhaps the pain is not so severe.

My thoughts can no longer stay coherent due to the pain, and useless fantasies stir within me. For now, I can only repeat aimless thoughts to distract myself from the pain. I remember the first childbirth up to a point, but right before the birth, my memories become vague. As the contractions intensified, my consciousness blurred again and again, and when the baby's cry reached my ears, Lionel wrapped in cloth was there.

Immediately after that, when the contractions resumed, my consciousness was cut off, and in a state of utter exhaustion, I delivered Ariel as well. Childbirth is a sacred act of life, yet it is always an act that neighbors death, and I fully understand why some women refuse to give birth again after experiencing it once. I have only just turned twenty. Neither the Bartfort family nor the Redgrave family is in such dire need that I must hurry to bear children.

"Is he still not here?"

My brother's anxious voice reaches my ears. It is obvious who he means by "he". In the end, Leon did not come to see me until things came to this. Heartless man. Does that insensitive man not understand how I have felt since leaving the Bartfort territory?

After telling me so many times how much he loved me, he fails only at the critical moment. I no longer care. Leon the fool, the idiot, the simpleton. I do not even want to look at your face. Just go back to the Bartfort territory without worrying about me. When contractions come, my heart fills with irritation from the pain, and when they retreat, I curse him in my mind.

Such thoughts are unbefitting of a viscountess, but the pain of childbirth throws both my mind and body into chaos. My senses are drenched in pain, my breathing becomes erratic as I try to ease it, and with rising body temperature, sweat pours down without end. Just sitting there drains my strength. Right now I am nothing more than a creature able only to moan while suffering from pain. Why am I suffering so much?

The answer is obvious: because Leon embraced me. After the war ended with the Holfort Kingdom's victory and Leon safely returned to the Bartfort territory. He had been depressed then, and I comforted him only because I had no choice. When he sought me, trying to fill the gap created by our separation, I could not bring myself to refuse. And Leon took me without holding back and made me pregnant.

I had heard that after childbirth, a mother should wait about two years before conceiving again, but it is hard to believe Leon aimed for it deliberately. His parents, the baron couple, have a large family with five children, and in the newly developed Bartfort territory, manpower is needed, so early marriage and childbirth among the young are encouraged.

"Since we are the lords, we should set the example" Leon had said many times in bed.

In other words, it is all Leon's fault. It must be. What should I do with this anger?

Gacha...

The door opens, and Cordelia enters in a hurry. The moment I saw the familiar face walking right behind her, my emotions exploded.

"What are you doing here, you bastard!!"

I grabbed the first thing my hand touched and threw it with all my strength. Leon made no move to dodge and stayed in place.

Thump.

The object I threw hit Leon and rolled across the floor with a soft sound. It seems it was a pillow. Everyone in the room froze at my action. Is my shouting really that shocking?

No, only Leon seems unbothered as he approaches me.

"How dare you show your face to me!?"

"Well, I mean, you said you wanted to see me in the letter..."

"Then come quickly! Because you dawdled, the labor pains started!"

"Is that... my fault?"

"Of course! Whose fault do you think it is that I'm suffering!?"

"...Sorry."

Startled by my fury, Leon shrank back. I know this is me taking it out on him, but because of the pain, I cannot control my emotions well. Even this is a moment when the pain has eased enough for me to barely maintain my rationality. If another contraction hits, I do not know what kind of terrible things I will scream at Leon.

"Um, you see, like I wrote in the letter, I brought Lionel and Ariel today. Will you see them?"

"..."

Why does he always take the most oblivious actions?

Does he think I want to show our children their mother writhing in agony from contractions?

But I have not seen the children in nearly a month. My maternal instincts barely surpassed the pain. I steadied my breathing and nodded slowly. From behind Leon, two small children with the same hair color as mine approached. Seeing them scrambling with their arms and legs, desperately trying to climb onto the bed, soothed my worn-out heart. When the maids lifted them onto the bed, the two who rushed to embrace me were so dear.

"Mother!"

"Mother."

Ariel clung to me while shouting, and Lionel watched me with worried eyes, holding my hand. They were opposites, yet I knew both were genuinely happy to see me again. I wanted to fully savor our reunion, but the situation was bad. The contractions were becoming shorter in interval, stronger, and fiercer. If the next wave came, I would show an unsightly state to my children, something unbecoming of a mother.

"You two, go wait in another room with Leon."

"No."

"No!"

"...Your little brother or sister will be born soon. Please."

They clung to me and refused to let go. Their strength was small, but in my current state, even that faint pressure was difficult to peel off. Trying to be at least a good mother, I gently stroked their heads, but their faces were full of confusion. It was only natural. They had never seen their mother pale, sweating, and in such a strange condition. Feeling pressed by the urgency to get them out of here, I glared at everyone present to make them act. A sense of discomfort rose in my lower back, and a few seconds later, a terrifying bolt of pain struck my brain.

"...Gahh..."

I could do nothing but crouch from the fierce pain around my lower back. Letting out a beast-like groan, I desperately tried to steady my breathing, but my mind was being filled completely with pain. The children were looking at me anxiously, but I had no room to care about them now. I wanted them moved to another room quickly, yet perhaps because the twins were my children, the servants were strangely hesitant.

I had only visited the ducal estate with them a few times, and even those few times I returned without staying overnight, so the servants were almost unfamiliar with Lionel and Ariel. The one who should be taking the lead at a time like this was Leon. And yet he was standing a little ways away from us, just watching. It was only natural that my anger turned toward Leon, who was in my line of sight.

"Don't just stand there watching like it's someone else's problem! Do something to help!"

"I'm trying not to get in the way! I'm being as considerate as I can, in my own way!"

"You can remain detached because you're not the one giving birth! Try feeling even a fraction of the excruciating pain I'm enduring!"

"Then what do you want me to do!?"

"You spouted off about wanting a big family! Saying you want eight children, are you insane!? You can say that easily only because you're not the one giving birth!"

"Don't say that in front of everyone!"

"You want me to endure this pain eight times!? Don't be ridiculous!"

"But you've already had two, so including this one it would be six…"

"Then you give birth instead!"

"Fweeeeen"

"Aaaaah"

Startled by the argument between Leon and me, the twins burst into loud crying. It was only natural. They had never once seen me this furious. As everyone stood stunned by my sudden change, Leon handed the twins to the servants and told them to take the children outside. By the time the servants carrying the children left the room, my patience had reached its limit.

"What are you staring at!? Get out of here, now!"

At my shout, everyone remaining in the room left except for Leon. In a heavy atmosphere, Leon and I faced each other for the first time in days.

※　※　※　※　※

"What did you come here for, you bastard!!"

The moment I entered the room, she screamed at me and threw a pillow. I’ll just assume it’s Angie being kind that she didn’t throw something expensive like a vase or a thick book. If I think about how much she hates me now, I feel so sad I could cry. From what I can see, the labor must have started several hours ago. Her complexion is slightly pale, but she still has some color, and judging from how she’s reacting to the pain, there should still be time before the actual delivery.

Since I was a kid, I helped when Finley and Colin were born and even with cows and sheep giving birth, so I have lots of experience with this kind of thing. I stayed by Angie’s side when she gave birth to Lionel and Ariel too, but it’s not good to rely on the special circumstances of her first labor with twins. Right now, the first priority is to calm Angie down.

"How dare you show your face to me!?"

"Well, um, I mean, because you wrote in the letter that you wanted to see me…"

"Then come quickly! Because you were dawdling, the labor pains started!"

"Is… that my fault?"

"Of course it is! Who do you think is responsible for my suffering!?"

"…Sorry."

This time too, Angie was supposed to give birth in the Bartfort territory. The reason she ended up giving birth at the ducal estate was because I attacked the ducal estate and made her angry. I was supposed to convince her as soon as possible, but while I was taking too long, she went into labor, so it’s definitely my fault. As a man, I can’t understand how painful childbirth is, but from seeing normally calm Angie so distressed, I can tell it’s unbelievably intense.

If it dragged on this long, maybe it would’ve been easier to just forcefully take her back. No, that would be a repeat of the attack incident. Her mood would get even worse. The only option left is to keep apologizing. To apologize and apologize and keep apologizing until her mood improves. I can’t think of any other solution.

"Um, well, like I wrote in the letter, I brought Lionel and Ariel with me today. Would you see them?"

"…………"

Trying to use my own children as bait to reconcile with her makes me the worst, but the children should come first. Father and Brother told me the two have been wanting to see Angie and me. It’s natural that reuniting parent and child is more important than fixing the relationship between husband and wife.

"Mother!"

"Mother."

Lionel and Ariel clung to Angie with happy expressions. Angie’s stiff face seemed to relax just a little. The duke, Gilbert, the servants and maids of the ducal estate all watched the reunion between mother and children. At least with this, even if Angie and I ended up separating, it doesn’t look like the two would be treated poorly.

"You two, go wait in another room with Leon."

"No."

"No!"

"…Your little brother or sister will be born soon. Please."

You never know what might happen during childbirth, and you obviously can’t relax with children nearby. It also took nearly half a day when the twins were born. Angie’s consciousness had been fading in and out, and I encouraged her desperately until it was over, but we can’t let our guard down. Maybe it would be good to let them greet the duke after so long.

"………Gahh"

I heard Angie groan. This is bad. A contraction wave must have come. To be blunt, the last time Angie went through labor, the situation was extremely intense. During the long hours of her first labor, she went back and forth between anger and tears, and I had to adapt to her mood each time. When she got angry, I needed to obey and accept her demands, and when she cried, I needed to comfort her and check what she wanted. Mother was experienced, having given birth to the five of us, and Father was used to assisting in childbirth, but Angie said it would be embarrassing to be seen by her in-laws, so we had them leave. I am the only one in the world who knows how terrifying Angie can be when irritated during childbirth.

"Don't just stand there watching like it's someone else's problem! At least try to help a little!"

"I'm trying not to get in the way! I'm doing my best to be considerate in my own way!"

"You can stay detached because you're not the one giving birth! Try experiencing even a fraction of the tremendous pain I'm enduring!"

"Then what am I supposed to do!?"

"You prattled on about wanting a big family! Wanting eight children, are you insane!? You can say that so easily because you're not the one giving birth!"

"Don't say that in front of everyone!"

That was half a joke I said when we slept together in the bedroom, wasn't it!? Is there any need to tell everyone here right now!?

"You want me to endure this kind of pain eight times!? Don't be ridiculous!"

"You already gave birth to two, so including this time it would be six, right?"

"Then you try giving birth!!"

"Fweeeeh"

"Aaaahhhn"

Ah, this is no good. Angie has completely lost herself from the labor pains, and anything I say will only add fuel to the fire. Lionel and Ariel started crying in fear because their mother suddenly began shouting. The people of the ducal estate probably think Angie has gone mad. I have no choice but to act as a shield here. We should take the children to another room. If this keeps up, the two of them will remain afraid of Angie, and that would be pitiful. For now, I pull the two away from Angie and the bed, hand them over to the maids nearby, and instruct them to move the children elsewhere.

"What are you staring at!? Get out of here, now!!"

At Angie's voice, everyone except me leaves the room. Amazing. The servants are one thing, but even the duke and Gilbert ran away in fear. If Angie acted like this during the reconciliation negotiations with the royal family, maybe I wouldn't have needed to threaten anyone?

Even the doctor went outside, so I'm the only one left to take care of Angie. Thinking about that, I sit down on the bed and move closer to Angie. I should calm her down first; it's bad for a pregnant woman to stay worked up like this. For now, I’ll direct her hostility toward me and keep the damage away from others. I really do end up with this kind of role all the time.

"…aguu, …kah"

"Does it hurt? Where is it?"

"My whole stomach and lower back hurt…"

"Let's get you into a comfortable position. I'll help you, so breathe slowly."

"…fuuuu, haaa"

I have Angie take deep breaths to calm her down. Once labor begins and the baby moves, the location and range of the pain keep shifting. Each time, we find the most comfortable position and endure the pain. Using the experience from when Lionel and Ariel were born, I support Angie’s back as she sits on the bed.

"Should I rub your lower back?"

"...I want you to stop until it eases."

"Got it."

Now that we're alone and she's calmed down, she doesn't insult or hit me. When the pain intensifies, I support her body and help her find a comfortable posture. I wait patiently until the contraction subsides and Angie's breathing steadies.

"…That's enough."

"Are you alright? What do you want to do?"

"I want to drink water."

I pour water from the pitcher into the cup nearby and let her drink slowly. Angie, drenched in sweat, gulps it down and asks for a second cup, so I rub her back to keep her from choking. The hand rubbing her back feels damp; the simple maternity dress has absorbed so much sweat that it's quite heavy.

"I'll wipe your sweat. First your face and back. Tell me if there's anywhere else you want wiped."

"…Very well."

With a lightly dampened towel, I slowly wipe Angie’s face and neck. Next are her arms, then her back. Angie’s flushed body looks strangely alluring, and just touching her makes me feel weird, so I force myself to restrain the feeling. I'm not stupid enough to get aroused in this situation.

…Well, I've finished wiping her, but I have no idea what to say now. I’ve done too many things wrong to simply apologize, and no matter what I say, Anje might get angry. This isn’t something that can be settled with “I like you” or “I don’t like you.”

We’re surrounded by issues like the grudges of ancestors who lived when the Holfort Kingdom was founded, and sentient Lost Items. If my lacking brain could come up with an answer that truly made sense, I would have handled everything better.

"…You should have come to get me sooner."

"I'm sorry."

"Was I really that terrifying?"

"You're not scary. What scares me is disappointing you."

"For a man who runs across a battlefield full of flying cannon fire to save me, that doesn't sound like something a criminal who attacked the ducal estate would say."

"I'm not doing any of that because I want to! I want to resolve everything peacefully, but every single person keeps being stubborn!"

"Which is why waiting patiently for me to forgive you is foolish."

"If I force things, you'll really give up on me for good."

"A woman, no matter how old she is, finds a man who risks his life for her to be attractive."

"But you're the one who insisted on staying at the ducal estate and refused to back down…"

"Did you say something?"

"No, nothing at all."

Maybe talking helped distract her a little, because Angie's expression gradually softened. Every time she feels pain and I take care of her, it feels like the time we were apart gets filled in a little, and I feel relieved. Also, timid Angie is cute. I love strong-willed Angie too, but this is nice in its own way.

"A few days ago, Prince Julius invited me, and I met with King Roland."

"…I see. Did you receive some kind of reward?"

"I declined. But he did tell me something pretty interesting."

"What was it?"

"He said my ancestor really was a companion of the first king. Seems like he was a pretty amazing guy."

"…I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I learned that recently as well. My father apparently knew and still arranged the marriage between you and me. Even knowing the truth, I treated you unfairly. What the ducal house valued was the Bartfort bloodline, not you as an individual."

"I see."

So that old man’s guess was right and there really was that kind of behind-the-scenes reason. Well, a marriage between a young upstart and the daughter of the biggest noble house in the kingdom normally wouldn’t happen. Political marriages between nobles are usually like that.

A love match like my parents or my brother and Dorothea is the rarer exception. Even if calculations were involved, as long as the couple gets along, there’s no need to dig it back up.

"Are you angry?"

"No, not really."

"The ducal house used you to try to gain the throne, you know."

"I guess that’s how it was."

"…Even if my role was to bear the child who would inherit Bartfort blood?"

"Did you get engaged to me for that reason?"

"No, but you’d have every right to suspect that."

"There’s no way I would ever doubt you."

The development of the Bartfalt territory is more than half due to Angie’s efforts. If the only purpose was to bear my child, she wouldn’t have needed to go that far. Even if that was the truth, I would only feel gratitude toward Angie. She’s the one who saved my life when I was on the verge of death.

"When you first came to the Bartfort territory, you were so fired up about proving yourself to the nobles in the capital. There’s no way that was an act."

"That did happen. How nostalgic."

"If it means you'll be happy, I don't mind separating. If you want to live in the capital, that's fine too."

"You're far too understanding."

"Then if I scream 'I don't want to separate!' will you forgive me?"

"I don't want to see such an unsightly version of you."

After answering, Angie began groaning again. Looking at the clock, more than an hour has passed. The contractions are getting closer; I should call the doctor soon.

"It looks like the baby will be born soon, so I'll get the doctor. Tell me your answer after the birth."

"…Very well."

A father is powerless at a time like this. All I can do is pray for the safety of Angie and the child about to be born. A life that survived by sheer luck on the battlefield. God, at least let Angie have a safe delivery in exchange for the rest of my lifespan. Hearing Angie’s groans behind me, I cursed my own helplessness.

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Authors Note

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The third child is finally about to be born.

There are no explicit descriptions, so the story goes only up to just before the birth.

Angie’s remarks while suffering from labor pains are based on things I actually heard someone say during childbirth. (Terrifying)

Many people say extreme things or panic from the pain, so please watch over her gently.

Postscript: At the requester’s request, the artist vierzeck created an illustration.

Thank you very much.

vierzeck: Pixiv

I would be grateful to receive your thoughts or impressions to encourage future work.