Volume 3 Interlude

 I knew she’d be gone by the time I woke up.

Even so, I can’t help but think—

Miyagi’s not here.

I’m not upset that the room is empty after a shallow, drifting sleep, nor do I wish I could go back to before I closed my eyes, but I’m disappointed.

I sit up and glance at the table from the bed.

The half-eaten yogurt sits there, proof that Miyagi had indeed been in this room.

She should’ve at least said something before leaving, even if I was asleep.

If she didn’t want to, she could’ve left a note.

But Miyagi isn’t the type for obvious gestures. She’s not the sort to visit someone who’s sick, yet she came like a normal person would—and then didn’t act like one. Miyagi’s always a little out of sorts.

I peel the cooling sheet from my forehead and grip it tightly.

It’s no longer cold.

It feels a little like Miyagi herself, the faint kindness she showed today.

I slip back under the covers and let out a small cough.

The cooling sheet Miyagi brought feels like it rewinds time. As I slowly close my eyes, I overlap with the version of me who regretted missing school before she came.

✧✧✧✧✧

I want to go back to school soon.

If I had gone, I wouldn’t have replied to Miyagi’s usual message with, “I’m out sick today, so I can’t come.”

I couldn’t go to her house today.

That fact weighs heavily on me, even under the covers.

Being stuck in this house with my mom all day is painful.

It’s suffocating.

Like I might stop breathing.

My mom doesn’t come to my room unless she has a reason. Even when I’m sick, that doesn’t change—she does the bare minimum and keeps her distance. I don’t want her to ask if I’m okay, but seeing her disinterested face when I’m unwell makes me compare myself to my older sister.

When my sister was sick, she was more—

Things I never cared about start to bother me.

I shouldn’t be catching a cold.

Especially not now, when my fever is finally starting to drop.

When I’m too sick, I lose the ability to think clearly, and my mind doesn’t wander to trivial things. But as the medicine kicks in and my fever drops from the high 38s to the high 37s, my thoughts return—and with them, my tendency to dwell on negativity. I wish I could think only good things, but my sick self drags me down, tilting my mood toward a bottomless swamp.

It’s easier to fall than to rise. I think of my sister, compare myself, and sink lower. Pointless thoughts swirl, pulling me down.

Under the covers, I touch the pendant Miyagi gave me.

I trace the chain over my pajamas and feel the moon-shaped pendant.

In moments like this, I need Miyagi.

At her place, I wouldn’t have to think about family.

Can I go to school tomorrow?

I touch my forehead. It’s still hot, so I grab the thermometer. Getting soaked in the rain never leads to anything good.

Before summer break, Miyagi almost made me take off my wet uniform.

That incident sparked the impure feelings I had for her.

This time, catching a cold and missing school makes me dwell on my situation—and think about Miyagi again.

It’s really not good.

I roll over and squeeze my eyes shut.

I’m not sleepy, and I can’t fall asleep.

I don’t have the energy to read or study.

Replying to messages from Ummina and the others feels like a chore.

But time won’t pass.

Having slept through both night and day, time still moves too slowly. Tomorrow feels impossibly far, like it will never come. This overly quiet room, where it’s hard to believe anyone else is in the house, feels abandoned by time.

I curl up, then stretch out.

The sound of my pajamas rubbing against the covers confirms that time is still moving.

Wanting to hear more, I strain my ears and catch the sound of someone climbing the stairs.

—Mom?

My body tenses.

She has no reason to come to my room at this hour, and no one else would be climbing the stairs. What a hassle, I think. The tap, tap of footsteps stops, and I sense someone at the door. But there’s no knock, no sound of it opening.

I focus on every little noise.

Even my breathing feels intrusive, so I hold it.

Then a loud thunk—a sound that doesn’t belong in this house—makes me sit up.

What was that?

Nothing happens after waiting.

The noise is followed by an eerie silence, unsettling in its intensity.

It’s not my mom.

She wouldn’t bang on the door like that.

Then who’s on the other side?

I quietly get out of bed and open the door.

“…Why’s Miyagi here?”

I don’t understand. Miyagi doesn’t come to my house. She’s not that kind of person, and I didn’t invite her.

“I was just leaving,” she says curtly, turning away.

“Wait, what’s going on?”

“It’s nothing, don’t worry.”

One step, two, three.

She walks away without looking back, and I instinctively step into the hall and grab her uniform.

There’s no way it’s nothing. Someone who shouldn’t be here is here—and that’s a big deal to me. It should be to her, too. She’s at the house of someone who isn’t a friend, someone she’s only visited once. It can’t be insignificant. That’s why she’s trying to escape without facing me.

“You say don’t worry, but of course I’m curious. There’s no way you’d come to my house for nothing.”

Unable to grasp the situation, I look around and notice something that wasn’t there earlier.

“What’s this? You brought it?”

I point to a white bag—probably from a convenience store or supermarket—hanging on the doorknob.

“It’s for you.”

“…Thanks. Wait, does this mean you came to check on me?”

“Not exactly.”

“Not exactly, but you came to my house?”

Given the situation, her visit can only have a purpose—but she says nothing. She just stands silently in the hall.

“Just come in.”

My mom rarely comes upstairs, but it would be a hassle if she saw us. I take the bag off the doorknob and go inside. Naturally, I’m still holding Miyagi’s uniform, and she follows. She closes the door behind her, and I let go of the uniform.

Back in my territory, with the door shielding us from my mom, I feel a little calmer—but my appearance bothers me. Pajamas, unkempt hair, no makeup, hoarse voice—it’s not a state for others to see. Yet Miyagi seems unbothered, glancing around the room like it’s something rare, though she’s been here before.

Speaking of which—

I almost gasp. My breath catches.

I didn’t put away the piggy bank full of five-thousand-yen bills today.

She doesn’t know what’s inside.

Still, it feels like a secret has been exposed, so I speak to cover it up.

“Miyagi, sit over there. I’ll grab something.”

“I brought drinks and food in that bag.”

I check the bag at her words and find drinks and food inside, just as I expected. But I’m surprised to see a cooling sheet for the forehead as well. I didn’t think Miyagi would bring something like this. I figured she’d shrug, saying, “I didn’t know what to get,” and show up with something useless.

Miyagi being thoughtful is unexpected.

But there’s only one bottle of drink in the bag.

“I’ll get something for you.”

“No need. Just rest. You’re sick, right? I’m leaving soon anyway.”

“Soon?”

“I could leave now.”

Her words don’t surprise me. We’re not the type to visit each other when one of us is sick, and staying longer might risk her catching my cold. Considering our past and the future, it’s better for Miyagi to leave soon.

But she came to see me when I’m stuck with too much time. If I let her go now, this room will be left behind by time again. I sit on the bed and look at Miyagi.

“I’ve slept too much to sleep more, so stay and talk.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Then just stay quietly for a bit.”

“How’s your fever?” Miyagi mumbles.

“Still there.”

“You should cool your head. There’s a sheet in the bag.”

Her finger points to the white bag.

I understand what she means—she wants me to put the cooling sheet on my forehead myself. But if she’s thoughtful enough to bring it, she could at least be a bit more considerate.

“You put it on for me, Miyagi.”

Yesterday, there was a cooling sheet left outside my room.

When I was a kid, my mom would put it on for me, but now it’s just left there, unused. The sheet stayed in the hall for a few hours before disappearing, and today, none was left out.

But the one Miyagi brought slipped into my room so easily.

“Do it yourself. Even with a cold, you can manage that.”

Her curt voice stings.

This Miyagi isn’t unusual, but it’s hard to accept.

I want her to take responsibility for bringing the cooling sheet. Maybe catching a cold has weakened me.

“Aren’t you being harsh to a sick person?”

“You’ve got a fever, so harsh is just right.”

Her voice doesn’t soften.

Miyagi stays the same, even with a sick person.

So cold… I don’t know why she even bothered visiting.

“You could listen to me, just for today.”

I take the cooling sheet box from the bag and toss it toward Miyagi, who’s still standing. This isn’t her room.

It’s my room, without the five-thousand-yen exchange. She can’t order me around here, and she could at least hear my request.

Of course, she doesn’t have to agree.

“Dangerous!”

Miyagi frowns at the box that fell at her feet. 

I might have looked the same at the cooling sheet left in the hall yesterday.

“Put it on. I’m sick, you know.”

Miyagi doesn’t move.

She just stares at the box with the cooling sheet.

The silence is heavy with my feverish fatigue. Asking for the sheet like a child makes the air awkward. The cooling sheet must be bad for me. Clinging to Miyagi isn’t like me. I should put it on myself, lower my fever, and return to normal.

I’ll do it myself.

As I start to say it, Miyagi picks up the box and approaches, and the part of me that wants to cling to her returns.

“Sit here.”

I pat the spot next to me, but she doesn’t sit. She stands in front of me, frowning.

“Miyagi, sit.”

I say it firmly, and with a reluctant look, she sits beside me and opens the box.

“Turn this way so I can put it on.”

She takes out the cooling sheet and speaks in a slightly softer voice. I face her obediently, and our eyes meet. In this uncomfortable house with my mom around, this room with Miyagi feels like a separate world, a little “after school” I need.

It’s different from when Miyagi came here in the summer. Maybe it’s because I haven’t been to school for three days, stuck in this suffocating house. Having her here feels… comfortable.

Her hand reaches toward me.

Her fingers almost touch my bangs, and I grab her hand.

The cooling sheet falls onto the bed, and I pull her hand closer.

I know what she wanted.

She just meant to lift my bangs to put on the sheet.

But I want to kiss Miyagi.

I want to feel her more, to make this place feel even better. To do that, our distance should be zero. And I kiss her lips.

They’re not cold, but not warm either.

Miyagi’s lips feel good.

I part her closed lips with my tongue and slip inside.

She doesn’t resist.

She quietly accepts my kiss.

I think about passing my cold to her.

But I can’t stop.

I catch her tongue and entwine it with mine. The mingling warmth of her body makes me feel her presence.

Kissing her makes being alone in this room feel like a lie. It makes me want to kiss her even more.

I press my lips harder.

Kissing deeply, she grabs my pajamas, and I slowly pull away.

“…That was absolutely not the time for a kiss.”

Her blatantly annoyed voice hits me.

“You came close.”

“You made me come close. You dropped the cooling sheet, and don’t do anything else, Sendai-san. That kind of kiss feels gross.”

Her voice had been gentle before the kiss, but now it’s cold.

“Say it softer. That hurts.”

With a cold, I can’t act like usual. Just thinking that my mom’s outside makes my body tense, and Miyagi’s words hurt my chest.

“I won’t. If it hurts, don’t do stuff like that again.”

The cooling sheet I didn’t use yesterday.

The me who’s different from when I was a kid.

Miyagi, coming to a room I don’t invite friends to.

On a day like today, with past and present mixed, I don’t want Miyagi—the one who creates my comfortable “after school”—to be too cold. I’ve lived in this house like it’s nothing, even after losing my family’s attention, but today I can’t. I can’t separate the past cleanly. Things that are usually nothing won’t stay that way.

So I wish Miyagi would be a bit kinder.

At least while she’s in this room.