Volume 5 Episode 05

Since that day.

Ever since the day I pierced Miyagi’s ear, she has started coming to my room. To be precise, it has only happened twice so far.

The first time was when I asked to borrow a manga. Miyagi brought it all the way to my room and left immediately afterward. The second time was today. While I was eating dinner, I said I wanted to borrow a dictionary, and she brought it to my room.

I already have a dictionary in my own room.

There was no real need to borrow one. I only wanted to test whether Miyagi would come to my room again. I think Miyagi realized that the dictionary was merely an excuse. Even so, she came, and now she is sitting right next to me.

Maybe it is because Golden Week has started and she is bored. Or maybe it is because I asked her to keep some days open during the holiday.

It could be one of those reasons, or it could be neither. Either way, Miyagi is sitting neatly beside me, quietly reading the manga she lent me.

I close the manga I had been reading and take hold of the platypus’s hand that is draped over the tissue box.

For a long time, my fixed place had been beside Miyagi, and Miyagi’s fixed place had been beside me. Now, though, I feel strangely restless. I think it is because there has been some distance between us since coming here.

If we talked about something, it might distract me, but I cannot think of anything to say. Since Miyagi is reading, there is no need to force a conversation. If I did talk, she might even tell me I am being noisy. I know it is better to stay quiet, but with Miyagi sitting right beside me, I want to talk.

I let go of the platypus’s hand, then grip it again.

The hand, which carries no body heat, is small, fluffy, and unreliable.

The platypus, which was forcibly relocated from the shared space to my room, might be some kind of message that Miyagi intends to keep coming here from now on. If that were not the case, it should not matter whether the tissue box in my room has a cover or not. Even so, I still do not understand why Miyagi, who had never once tried to come to my room before, suddenly decided to do so.

I continue squeezing the platypus’s hand gently.

“Sendai-san, do you like that one?”

A voice comes from the spot beside me that had been silent until now. When I shift my gaze from the platypus to Miyagi, I find that she, who was supposed to be reading, is looking at me instead.

“That one?”

“The platypus. You’ve been touching it the whole time, so I thought you might like it.”

“Well, somewhat.”

I answer like that and lightly pat the platypus’s head a couple of times. It is not that I am embarrassed about being seen playing with the tissue cover, but I suddenly do not know what to do with my hands. I open the manga I had been reading earlier, lean back against the bed as a backrest, and turn one page, then another. By the fifth page, Miyagi’s voice reaches me.

“…When does the tutoring job start?”

I close the manga I had just opened and look beside me. After hearing about the tutoring job from my senior, I accepted it on the spot.

“It’s supposed to start after the holiday ends. Are you going to get a part-time job, Miyagi?”

“No.”

“Are you planning to join a club or something?”

“Not interested. Sendai-san, aren’t you joining a club either?”

“I’m not. I want to spend my time on other things.”

Since entering university, everyone I have befriended has said the same things, that this club is good, or that club is good. It feels like clubs come bundled with the word “university.” I have also been asked what I plan to do. But I do not particularly want to expand my social circle, and there is nothing I want to do as part of a group. Spending my time working part-time seems more meaningful. And if Miyagi is at home, I think I would like to spend time eating meals together with her.

“I thought that once you entered university, Sendai-san, you’d join a club or go to mixers or do typical college student things.”

“Do I look like that type?”

“…You used to read the magazines Ibaraki-san reads and go out to play together, so I thought you might do the same in university.”

“I see.”

“You seem like the type who would go out with friends during Golden Week too.”

“I’m not going out. I’ll be at home.”

“Why are you staying home?”

Miyagi asks with an unusually serious expression.

“Why, huh… I wonder why.”

Because Miyagi is here.

That is all, yet when I think about it again, the answer feels strange. Miyagi and I are not the kind of relationship where we go out together, nor are we actively trying to share time. I am the only one who one-sidedly wants to go out together or spend time together. Miyagi merely goes along with someone like me from time to time.

I swallow the sigh that nearly escapes.

“You’re not going back home during the break, right, Miyagi?”

On the day I pierced her ear, she mentioned that she had some open days during the holiday. But I have not asked whether she actually has plans.

“Like I said before, I’m not going back.”

“You won’t meet your friends from your hometown?”

“I’m not meeting them during Golden Week.”

“So you don’t have any plans, then?”

“I’m going out with Maika.”

As expected.

I nearly say it out loud.

If she has plans, they are with Utsunomiya.

That is exactly what I thought, and a sigh escapes me.

“If you’re going out with Utsunomiya, then go out with me too.”

“I’m fine going with Maika. Besides, Sendai-san and I don’t share the same hobbies anyway.”

Just like the other day, when she bluntly said she absolutely did not want to go out with me, Miyagi answers without hesitation.

She will go out with Utsunomiya, but she does not want to go out with me.

That kind of response feels unpleasant.

It irritates me, and my stomach twists uncomfortably.

“That’s true, but…”

Our hobbies do not match, but there are things I want to see together.

Her ear is hidden by her hair right now, but Miyagi is wearing the piercing I put in. That piercing is not one I chose. If possible, I would like her to wear a piercing that I picked myself. If it is meant to remind us of our promise, then a piercing I chose would be better. I want to go look for one that suits Miyagi more, together.

But I also know she would never agree to go look for piercings with me.

“When is your birthday, Miyagi?”

She probably would not accept a present even if I gave her one, but I ask anyway.

“Why so sudden?”

“I just realized I don’t know your birthday.”

“September.”

“That much I already know. What day in September?”

When she gave me the pendant, I learned that her birthday was in September. But I know nothing more than that.

“…I don’t want to say it right now.”

As if sensing something unpleasant, Miyagi furrows her brows.

“Then tell me sometime.”

“If I feel like it.”

She answers curtly and lowers her gaze back to the manga. She came and sat beside me so naturally, yet she remains distant.

“The piercing you’re wearing now, did you choose it yourself?”

“I went shopping for it with Maika.”

Today, only uninteresting information comes out of Miyagi. I wanted to talk, but not this kind of conversation. I am not talking to hear things I do not want to know.

“Move your hair behind your ear.”

I tug lightly at Miyagi’s hair as she continues reading without lifting her face.

“Why?”

“Because I can’t see the piercing.”

“There’s no need to show it.”

“You got the piercing so I could see it, didn’t you?”

“I’m not promising anything right now.”

“You promised to keep Golden Week open.”

That is probably not the kind of promise tied to the piercing. Still, I want to check whether she is wearing it. Since the hole needs time to settle, she should not have removed it. I know she is still wearing it.

Even so, I want to see it. I want to see the piercing in Miyagi’s ear, in the hole that I made.

Back when we were still in high school, I understood how Miyagi felt when she wanted to check the pendant. I feel the same way now. I want to check Miyagi’s piercing.

“Show me the piercing.”

I reach toward Miyagi’s right ear. She looks like she wants to complain, but she does not dodge. I tuck her black hair behind her ear.

The silver piercing comes into view.

The one I put in looks like a mark that Miyagi belongs to me. I know it is not actually like that, but the fact that she asked me to pierce her ear, and that I personally made the hole and inserted the piercing with my own hands, overlaps in my mind and makes it feel special.

I reach toward the piercing, then stop.

I want to touch it, but I hesitate. Touching the spot where I just made the hole probably is not a good idea yet.

“Is that enough?”

Miyagi says. Miyagi tries to return the hair I tucked behind her ear to its original place, so I catch her hand. Then, just like on the day I pierced her ear, I press my lips to it.

Miyagi has done something similar to me before.

She kissed the pendant and touched it again and again.

“Sendai-san!”

Her voice sounds very close.

Careful not to touch the piercing, I move my tongue slowly. I place the tip of my tongue against the cartilage. It feels slightly cold, slightly hard.

I press against it, as though trying to transfer my body heat. Miyagi’s shoulder gives a small tremor.

At some point, her hand grips my arm tightly.

I kiss her ear again.

Once, twice.

The third time, I press my lips directly over the piercing.

“That spot hurts, so stop.”

Miyagi pushes me away.

I obediently pull back and look at her face, but she does not seem to be in much pain.

“Then I’ll do it where it doesn’t hurt.”

I lightly brush my lips against the upper part of her ear. Miyagi pushes me away again.

“Sendai-san, get away from me.”

When I press my lips more firmly, trying to convey that I do not want to stop, Miyagi’s hand comes up near my jaw. Then she pushes hard, and my body shifts slightly away. Just as I grab her rough hand, about to complain, Miyagi suddenly pulls me toward her, and my earlobe flares with heat.

It hurts.

A lot.

Something hard clamps down on my earlobe.

It is Miyagi’s teeth.

She is biting me.

She never holds back in moments like this. Even now, she bites down with full force, making my ear burn with pain. As retaliation for what I did, it is excessively rough. I would not be surprised if my ear were torn off.

Gradually, the sensation begins to dull.

I should push her away.

Just like she did to me.

I know that.

And yet.

I am strange.

I wrap my arms around Miyagi’s back.

I pull her close and hold her tightly.

The pressure on my ear disappears, and the pain fades.

Miyagi is in my arms. She is unimaginably close. Heat flows between us where our bodies touch, making me want to draw her even nearer. But I cannot get closer than this. The more I try, the more my body seems to be pushed away.

“What is this? Does that mean you want me to bite harder?”

Miyagi speaks as if irritated.

“What if I say yes?”

[T/N - My god this woman is downbad.]

“As expected, Sendai-san really is a pervert.”

Even though there is no need to press further, Miyagi pushes my shoulder to create distance. Then she takes a tissue from the platypus’s back and wipes her ear.

“Sendai-san, wipe your ear too.”

She pushes the platypus toward me.

I am pleased that she is concerned about my ear, but if she is going to care, I wish she would not bite me in the first place.

I reach toward my ear, which has lost about half its sensation, then instead pull out a tissue. She would not accept complaints anyway, so without saying anything, I quietly wipe my ear.

“What are you going to do during the break?”

Miyagi asks in a subdued voice.

I thought she would return to her room immediately, but she remains seated beside me. Still, she does not turn to face me.

“What do you want to do, Miyagi?”

“Why are you asking me? You said you would think of something, Sendai-san.”

“I want to hear your opinion.”

“…Then, that.”

As she says this, Miyagi points toward the top of the table.

“The tablet?”

In this room, which is missing things that were once there, there are also things that did not exist before. One of them is the tablet sitting on the table, serving as a replacement for a television in a room without one.

“Yes. I want to watch a movie or something on that.”

I think it is not a bad idea. In fact, it is probably the only thing we can do without going out.

“Is my room okay?”

“It’s fine, but no weird stuff.”

“I won’t do anything.”

“You already did earlier.”

“I promise I won’t.”

When I say it firmly, Miyagi turns toward me.

Once again, I tuck her hair behind her ear and look at the piercing. The piercing is proof that I changed the shape of the person named Miyagi.

It is only a small change. Nothing more than the addition of a tiny accessory, a change many people might never notice. Even so, for me, it was an unforgettable event.

My existence altered Miyagi’s form.

In a way that will remain forever.

No matter what kind of promise it is, there is no way I would ever forget it.

“Sendai-san. Don’t break the promise.”

“It’s okay. I won’t.”

I lightly touch the piercing, then let her hair fall back into place, hiding her ear.

If it were only about making me remember the promise, she could have written it down and handed it to me, or taped it to my door. But she did not. Instead, she chose to bind it to the piercing. Because of that, I will not break the promise.

Even so, a part of me wants to break the rules and get ordered to do something again.

I would never say something like that to Miyagi, but the thought exists within me.

Still, I will not break the promise I just made.

The promise of “no weird stuff” probably also includes the promise of “just watching a movie in my room.” Miyagi did not say it outright, but that is how I understand it.

“Miyagi. Think about what movie you want to watch, okay?”

I gently pat the platypus’s head.

✧✧✧✧✧

The weather is bad.

To be precise, it has been pouring heavily since morning.

Most people would complain about such rain during a holiday. But for someone like me, staying home, it makes no difference. If there is a problem, it is that the movie playing on the tablet is boring.

“Is it interesting?”

I ask Miyagi, who is staring intently at the screen beside me.

“Pretty much.”

“Which part?”

“…Various parts.”

Her reply can hardly be called an answer.

On the tablet, some character I do not quite understand moves about. Miyagi continues watching, fully absorbed. Even when I speak, she does not look my way.

Watching a movie on the tablet.

As a way to spend the holiday that Miyagi suggested, it was reasonable for two people with little in common. But precisely because we have little in common, our preferences in movies do not overlap. Since I left the choice entirely to Miyagi, I have no right to complain. I am the one who gave her that freedom.

Still, I think I should have voiced my opinion at least a little.

The movie, which appears to be based on a game, was interesting at first. Halfway through, however, it became incomprehensible. Maybe it is because I do not play games, but I cannot say it is enjoyable.

“Miyagi, where is the interesting part?”

I poke her lightly, our shoulders nearly touching.

She does not respond.

She does not even react.

That, too, is uninteresting.

To be honest, I am getting tired of this.

It is boring.

I am glad this is my room. If we were in a theater, I would not be able to speak or poke her just because I am bored.

“Hey, Miyagi.”

Taking advantage of being in my own room, I poke her again. This time, Miyagi reaches out and stops the video on the tablet.

“Sendai-san, you’ve been noisy for a while. I don’t mind if we stop watching, but please be quiet.”

With the same hand she used to stop the movie, she pushes my shoulder.

It is not a strong push, just a light one, so she is not truly angry. Still, her voice is lower than usual, and her expression is clearly irritated. It is good that the movie interests her enough for interruptions to bother her. But the more interesting it is for Miyagi, the less interesting it becomes for me. The balance is terrible. Sharing time with her in a way that feels “fun” seems incredibly difficult.

“Do you want something to drink? I’ll get it.”

I stand up to change the mood.

“…Cider.”

Her reply is flat.

“Got it. You can keep watching.”

I leave the room and open the cupboard, take out glasses, and let out a quiet breath.

I should have taken control and forced a horror movie on her. I should have scared her so badly she could not stay alone in her room at night. I doubt Miyagi would sit quietly through a horror movie, but still, I should have done that.

“…Well, if I actually did, it would end with me getting bitten or kicked, wouldn’t it?”

I take orange juice and cider from the refrigerator and pour them into the glasses. I hesitate briefly, then place both on a tray and return to the room.

I set the glass of clear liquid and the glass of orange liquid beside the tablet.

“Thanks.”

Miyagi, who seems to have been waiting, presses play and resumes watching the screen.

I sit beside her.

I do not look at the screen.

I look at Miyagi instead.

In a hoodie and denim pants.

The weather is bad and cold, or perhaps that is simply why she is dressed so warmly. It feels typical of Miyagi, who is sensitive to the cold. Her long-sleeved top and long skirt stand in clear contrast to my own outfit.

Her hairstyle is the same as always, unchanged.

That is why, even today, her ears remain hidden.

She made me go out of my way to put on earrings, yet Miyagi refuses to show her ears. Even when I tell her to tie her hair up so the piercings can be seen, she does not listen. Maybe she is embarrassed, or maybe she is not. I do not really know the reason, but the fact that they are hidden only makes me want to see them more.

I reach out toward Miyagi, who is staring only at the tablet. I touch the hair that conceals her ear.

Miyagi immediately brushes my hand away, as if it is annoying. Still, I touch her hair again and tuck it behind her ear.

The piercing is revealed, and Miyagi pauses the movie that had been playing.

“Do not interfere.”

Without responding to her voice, I touch her neck.

When my fingertips slide along it, Miyagi frowns.

“Sendai-san, go sit farther away.”

She pushes my shoulder hard and places the platypus between us.

“Do not lay a hand on me and cross the tissue until the movie is over.”

Miyagi says something dull and unimaginative.

When I stay silent, she releases the pause, and the screen begins moving again. If I irritate her any further, it will probably become troublesome, so I reach for the orange juice, drink about half of it, and set it back on the table.

“Hey, Miyagi.”

I call out, already knowing there will be no response. Her eyes remain fixed on the screen, and she does not look at me.

“I want to kiss you.”

I made a promise with Miyagi not to do anything strange.

I do not consider a kiss to be something strange, but it probably falls into that category for Miyagi, so I have not acted on it. I only said it out loud. Surely that much is allowed.

“Miyagi.”

I call her again, the one who refuses to look at me.

“Why do I have to kiss Sendai-san?”

She speaks in a displeased voice, still watching the screen.

“We did it before.”

“That was then. Now is different. We are roommates, are we not?”

Miyagi looks at me.

Her words are not pleasant, but they are not wrong either. I place the platypus on the bed and lean against her, resting my shoulder on hers.

“Sendai-san, you are heavy.”

Her voice is cold, but she does not push me away.

“Does Miyagi not want to kiss?”

“I do not.”

“I thought you would say that.”

“Then do not ask.”

Her gaze returns to the screen. Noisy voices spill out of the tablet one after another, filling the room.

“Miyagi, give me an order. I will listen to anything right now.”

“I will not, and you do not have to listen anyway.”

She denies everything I say. Strangely, that fact comforts me today. Even with the piercings, Miyagi is still Miyagi.

I want her to change, yet I am also afraid of her changing. If I push too far and Miyagi ends up leaving this house, the thought terrifies me. That is why, for now, her steady rejection of my desires reassures me. If she did not reject them, I would not be able to stop myself. I would want to go all the way.

“Sendai-san, you have no intention of watching the movie, do you?”

Miyagi pushes me away.

Even though I had deliberately placed the platypus on the bed, we end up sitting far enough apart that it feels as though it will soon be returned to the floor.

“I do want to watch it, but that movie is boring.”

I turn off the tablet.

“I was still watching that.”

“Let us watch something else. A horror movie, maybe.”

“Absolutely not.”

Miyagi glares at me openly, her dissatisfaction unmistakable. Then, despite having told me not to touch her, she reaches out instead. There is no platypus forming a boundary now, yet she clearly crosses the space where it had been and grabs the front of my long-sleeved top. She pulls at it without restraint, and I catch her hand.

“If you pull that hard, the clothes will stretch.”

They are not expensive, but I do not want them ruined. Miyagi must hear me, yet she ignores my words and pulls even harder. Not wanting the fabric to stretch, I lean toward her.

“Miyagi, let go.”

I try to pry her fingers loose, but they refuse to release their grip. Her face draws closer, her breath brushing against my neck. My shoulders twitch involuntarily. She moves even closer, and something warm presses against my skin.

Her lips.

They latch onto my neck and suck forcefully.

It is not as sharp as being pierced by a needle, but a sudden pain shoots through me.

The tip of her tongue touches my skin, lukewarm.

Miyagi does not pull away.

We are far too close.

I can hear my own heartbeat, though I should not be able to. It is louder than the movie that had been playing earlier. Her lips press harder, and the sucking intensifies.

The pain spreads inward, passing beyond the skin and sinking deep into my body. There will definitely be a mark.

This is bad.

I know that, yet I feel the urge to wrap my arms around her. My hands hesitate, uncertain, and end up stroking her hair instead. At that, Miyagi pulls away easily.

The pain disappears.

I do not need to look to know how my neck looks.

“You are an idiot, Miyagi. That definitely left a mark.”

“It is Sendai-san’s fault.”

She speaks irritably and stares at my neck.

“Even so, there are things you should and should not do.”

From her sharp gaze, I understand well enough what my neck looks like. I pick up a hand mirror to confirm.

Just as expected.

On the side of my throat, clearly visible, is a vivid red mark.

“Hey, Miyagi. At least do it somewhere that is not visible. What am I supposed to do about this?”

“If I did it somewhere hidden, Sendai-san would not reflect on it, would you?”

“This is not about reflection. Leaving a mark in such an obvious place is the worst.”

“You said you were not going anywhere during the break, right? Then it does not matter where it is.”

“I know, but you are going out with Utsunomiya.”

“I am going out, but Sendai-san can just stay home the whole time.”

As she says that, Miyagi pushes my shoulder.

“Stay home too, Miyagi.”

“No. I already promised Maika.”

Her words strike my head with a sharp click.

It annoys me. It really annoys me.

I look into the mirror again.

The mark is unmistakable.

And it is right where anyone would notice it.

I did say I would stay home during the break, but I never said I would not step outside at all. Plans could come up. I might need to go to the convenience store. But with this, I cannot go out. I could hide it with a turtleneck, yet that would feel unnatural for this season. If I go out without covering it, strangers will speculate. If I run into a friend, they will definitely comment. If I brush it off by saying I have a boyfriend, they will demand to meet him or see a photo. I cannot say anything careless.

Miyagi is extreme.

She said she did not want to kiss, yet she does something like this without hesitation. Normally, you do not leave marks on a roommate’s neck. I may have provoked her, but when she acts like this, I can no longer understand what kind of relationship she wants.

And I am no better. I was the one who suggested becoming roommates, yet I do not know what kind of relationship I want either. Everything between us has remained vague.

All I know is that I want to be together.

I sigh and set the mirror down.

I touch my neck, gently rubbing the spot where the mark remains.

“Miyagi.”

“What?”

She looks at me without the slightest hint of remorse. I press my temple and let out an exaggerated sigh.

“…Shall we continue watching?”

I am amazed at how quickly I forgive her.

I turn the tablet back on, the same one I had turned off myself. In the end, the movie is boring.

Miyagi and I truly do not share the same tastes.

Even so, I find myself preferring to sit through the dull movie rather than think about her going out with university friends. Still, forcing her to stay home by leaving a mark like this cannot be called a good thing.

Late at night, I look again at the mark Miyagi left behind.

Time has passed, yet the red color is still clear in the mirror. I already knew that would be the case.

Something created today will not disappear today.

I place the hand mirror on the table and lean back against the bed.

I could make it less noticeable with concealer or foundation. But I do not feel like going out enough to bother with that.

“…I suppose I have no choice but to stay home.”

If I remain here, there is no need to hide it at all. It is bothersome to go out while worrying about the marks Miyagi left behind, and I have not made any promises with friends either. During the consecutive holidays, Miyagi will not be home the entire time, so I thought it might be acceptable for me to go out with friends as well. Even so, there is no particular place I want to go, and no place I must go.

If I simply wait until the holidays end and return to university, I will inevitably see my friends there.

I am not entirely free of dissatisfaction about being the only one staying home while Miyagi goes out to have fun with Utsunomiya, but spending time lazing around at home is not such a bad thing either.

Still, when I think about what Miyagi did to me today, that dissatisfaction swells.

Come to think of it, I feel as though I have always been the one treated harshly ever since high school.

For instance, she once put marks on my arm just to test whether placing sliced lemon on a hickey would make it disappear faster.

For instance, she unbuttoned my rain-soaked uniform and left a hickey on my chest.

Miyagi never does anything remotely decent.

Even so, I chose to live with Miyagi, and here I am now. If I were to explain my current situation to the version of myself from last year, she probably would not believe it.

I press the marks Miyagi left firmly with the palm of my hand.

Miyagi seems like someone utterly unfamiliar with the concept of restraint, yet even so, it feels as though she held back slightly more in the beginning. Now, there is no hesitation at all.

I lift my back from the bed and hug my knees.

My gaze drifts to the platypus lying flat beneath the table.

The one with tissues sprouting from its back is something we bought to use together, yet it feels as though it belongs to Miyagi. It probably resembles the crocodile tissue cover in her room, and I find myself naturally accepting the presence of such things in my own space. In the past, having more of Miyagi’s belongings in my room felt burdensome, but now I can think of the uniforms and T-shirts of hers stored in the chest as part of what constitutes my room.

I stand up and take the accessory case from the top of the chest. I place it on the table and remove the pendant Miyagi gave me.

On the day of the graduation ceremony, this pendant was left in my hands in exchange for the envelope, yet it has never had an occasion to be worn.

I want to touch Miyagi the way I did when I wore this pendant. I regret that I did not kiss Miyagi while she was watching the movie.

I loop the silver chain around my finger.

The small moon-shaped ornament catches my eye. I trace the chain with my fingertips and grip the tiny ornament tightly.

It is not that I want to return to those days, but I envy the version of myself from back then. I pull the platypus closer and place the pendant on its head. I roll onto the bed and lightly tap the wall.

The sound is not loud, so there is no response, but I hear movement from next door. In the stillness of the dead of night, without even straining my ears, I recognize the sound of a door opening.

I sit up on the bed.

I hesitate over whether to go out to the common area.

There is nothing in particular I want to talk about.

After thinking for about a minute, I stand up. I am glad I bought sweatpants to use as pajamas.

They make it easy to step into the common area without much thought.

When I open the door, the light is on, and I see Miyagi standing in front of the refrigerator. She is wearing familiar sweatclothes, or rather, the sweats I borrowed when I stayed at her house during winter break.

“Aren’t you going to sleep?”

I call out to her from near the table, and she answers curtly.

“I am, but I’m thirsty.”

Miyagi takes out a bottle of cider from the refrigerator. She pours it into a glass and drinks about a third of the clear liquid.

“Isn’t Sendai-san going to sleep?”

Miyagi looks at me while holding the glass.

“I thought I’d get something to drink too.”

I offer a reason that could plausibly explain why I came to the common area.

“Should I get you orange juice?”

“Hm, I’ll have what Miyagi’s drinking. Give me a sip.”

“It’s cider, though.”

“I can see that.”

“…Then I’ll give you the rest.”

Saying this, Miyagi walks over and hands me the glass.

“I don’t need that much.”

I am not actually thirsty, and I do not particularly like carbonated drinks. Even so, since I was the one who said I wanted some, I take a sip as I promised and try to return the glass. Miyagi does not take it. With no other choice, I drink about half of it and place the glass on the table. Miyagi then calls my name.

“Sendai-san. Are you going out tomorrow?”

When she asks, I answer quietly.

“Thanks to someone, I can’t go out even if I want to.”

“Hm.”

Even though she was the one who asked, she sounds uninterested. Miyagi finishes the cider left in the glass on the table, then says she will clean it up and starts toward the sink.

“Won’t you talk a little more?”

I grab Miyagi’s arm.

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“It doesn’t have to be anything specific.”

I take the glass from her hand and place it back on the table. I step closer to Miyagi.

I reach out and touch her lips with my fingertips.

“You said you wanted to talk.”

Miyagi frowns. Her displeasure is evident, but she does not pull away. I release the arm I was holding.

“Tell me something, Miyagi.”

“You’re the one who said you wanted to talk.”

“Did I?”

I stroke Miyagi’s cheek and press my palm flat against it. She must understand what I am trying to do, and I think she should run away right now.

“Miyagi.”

Even when I call her name, she does not move.

My memory drifts back to high school.

The music preparation room where I called her out after the cultural festival.

I grabbed Miyagi’s arm when I stopped the girl who had been enjoying the festival without me, and I told her that if she did not want to be kissed, she should run away.

I had not intended to kiss her then, but suddenly I wanted to, and I touched her.

It is not exactly the same as now, but it feels very similar. I bring my face closer to Miyagi’s.

She says nothing. Since she does not close her eyes herself, I close mine.

Then I press my lips against hers.

They are soft and warm.

It is the familiar sensation of her lips.

Yet perhaps because it has been a while since I last touched them, my heart pounds so violently it feels as though it might shatter, and my mind goes blank. Even though we are merely pressing our lips together, it becomes unbearable, and I pull away. Almost immediately, I kiss her again, pressing my lips more firmly this time.

I grab Miyagi’s arm. As I try to pull her closer, she shakes off my hand and pushes my shoulder.

It is not enough.

I want to kiss her more.

I grab her hand.

She shakes it off again, and this time she kicks my leg.

“Why didn’t you run away?”

When I want her to run, Miyagi does not. When I expect her to run anyway, she accepts it with ease. If she had run away before the kiss, I would not have ended up wanting more.

“…I was just testing whether Sendai-san is a liar. As expected, you were lying. When we promised to watch the movie, you said you wouldn’t do anything weird.”

“That just meant I wouldn’t do it in my room.”

“That’s the kind of thing I hate about you, Sendai-san.”

Miyagi says this resentfully and kicks me a little above the ankle, harder than before.

“That one hurt.”

Even though she held back, I complain, and she kicks the same spot again.

“I’m going back to my room.”

Miyagi turns her back to me. As she walks toward her room as declared, taking three steps away, I call out to her.

“What are you doing tomorrow, Miyagi?”

“Going out with Maika.”

“The weather forecast says it’s going to rain tomorrow too.”

Miyagi, who had been facing away, turns around sharply.

“You’re lying again, Sendai-san. I checked the forecast earlier, and it said it would be sunny.”

My casual lie is immediately denied.

“Then maybe I misread it. Are you free the day after tomorrow?”

“…I’m free.”

“Because of these marks, I can’t go anywhere, so let’s watch another movie.”

I touch my neck and smile.

Since Miyagi is the one who made it impossible for me to go out, she should take responsibility. At the very least, she should help me pass the excess time.

“I absolutely won’t watch a movie you like, Sendai-san.”

“That’s fine.”

I answer without losing my smile, and Miyagi says “good night” in the most displeased voice I have heard from her today.